i`m depressed.

// just freak out. let it go.

You are Black Wolf person, who gives an impression of being difficult and rather stiff.
But you are also simple and honest.
You are responsible person and are able to observe other people well.
You are intelligent and never lose your composure.
You lead life slowly at your pace keeping your dreams and hopes.
You tend to be calm and objective, but you also have complicated side to your personality.
You are an artistic type of person.
You have good sense of humor, and have lots of talent, and are good at making conversation.
You are indifferent to public opinion and custom.
You strictly stick to your philosophy and rules of life.
You have unique identity, and people tend to see you as an inconsiderate person who is not prepossessed with common sense.
Your attitude gives an impression of unemotional cold hearted person.
You may end up receiving great fortune and honor from no where.
But this may be far from your will.
Your defiant energy is great.
You can use your individuality to do things that no other person can, and lead happy fulfilled life.

wahahha.kinda true i guess. =P
damn it..haven`t studied!!
got home only, fell asleep.
im such a pig..

// i dun`t wanna fall ta pieces.

went ta ngee ann early in the morning.
ruilong pangseh me. =/
had ta sit in uncomfortable silence w/ nabil and hanif.
gawd. it sucked.
thn we were kinda lost at ngee ann.
walked all ovr the place.
and in the end..
lecture theatre 77 was right whr we alighted frm cab.
lecture not bad la. mind-mapping.
did you even know thr are "laws" to mind-mapping?
thn found out ACS[I] guys are damn lame.
very outgoing but lame. =P

yar..thn aft tuition parents picked me up fer dinner.
actually wanted ta just stay at skate park.
and some other reason..
so wuz kinda moody i guess.
mum got irritated by me.
whtevr la. thn going home.
sms-ed dad although we were in same car.
ahaks. he got 6230 too.
mum is gonna freak soon cuz now we both have it.
"it`s a waste of money."

hmm. ever wondered?
it`s always mummy`s boy.
or daddy`s girl.
maybe it`s why im so much closer ta my dad.
he`s like this teen that`s stuck in an adult`s body.
i guess that`s why he needs my mum so much.
ta nag at him, remind him of his actaul age. x)

wahahhaa.feelin damn hyper-rish and happy.
trained.
so few ppl today mann.
3 or 4 didn`t come sch..
thn another 4 or 5 sick went home.
b div was like left with abt 9ppl lor. =/
pro la all these ppl.
from 18ppl ta 9 ppl. tsktsk.
but was fun la.
coach quite good mood.
thn aft training sorta "performed" fer coach.
wahaha. "the shorts song"
make sounds by pulling the elastic band!
haha..retarded la. but we were all laughing. =P

i wanna watch nsl finals tmr.
problem is i got tuition at 7pm.
game is at 730. aiz-
thn even if i were free i dunno how ta go thr.
and tmr morning hafta be at ngee ann poly at 8.15!
wth mann. so damn early..so damn farr.
all fer dunno whut stewpid mind-mapping contest. o.O

love is a battlefield.
as quoted frm 13 goin on 30! =]
[it`s a stewpid quote, i know]
whee~ went ta watch with ren and adora.
my darling movie partners.
actually wanted ta eat at billy bombers.
but decided on a movie instead.
damn budget-ed..lol.
so bought food frm supermarket.
but it got "confiscated" at the entrance.
didn`t know they cld do that?
haha..anyways. show was really really nice!
typical romance comedy la..but different.
ya`ll shld go and catch it.

last night was..bad.
kinda got into an argument.
thn suddenly buk msg-ed me.
sth happened ta him too.
2 of us..somewhat consoling each other.
weirdly pathetic.
need ta meet up with him soon though.
still owe him lunch.

and oh yeah..phototaking today.
argh- im stuck in a lame class.
but it`s okay la..still had fun. lol.
thn like aft recess stayed back.
just ta watch 3f`s phototaking.
they damn cute lor.
mr peters provide them with sunglasses.
thn they bring props fer the funshot also.
wahaha.thn taufiq kneeling on floor.
pretending gonna be beheaded by the others.
but it`s kinda freaky.
cuz this yr, photos were taken in front of the statues.
the scary one of the boy and girl.
got lotsa stories abt the statues. =P

anyhow. i shld learn ta learn frm past mistakes.
fer the 2nd time, i got my sim card blocked.
dad was laughing at me.
"how stupid cld you get?" lol.
such a hassle.
had ta call the service thingie.
and i need ta change my hepB appointment!
it`s nxt thurs.
but it`s common test week and fri i have a.mths plus bio.
grades been dropping.
got the worst mark ever in all my bio tests.
so i better strt studying.
be a nerd..bury myself in my books.
coach expects a lot frm us anyways.

mann.
shld have known sth was gonna happen.
coach called.
she asked me some stuffs.
and whut cld i do but answer honestly?
kinda feel bad cuz i dun`t want HER ta get into trouble.
but..aiz-

// i`ll run away with *you..by my side.

a king was distraught. his favourite horse was missing. he sent ppl ta look fer it and offered a large reward fer its return but to no avail. however, a simple servant told the king he`d find the horse. the king had nothing to lose so he told the simpleton ta do what he could do. within hours, the simpleton found the horse. how did the simpleton do it? it was a matter of viewpoint. the simpleton put himself in the horse`s place. in doing so, he could better understand how the horse`s thought process worked. walk a mile in someone else`s shoe if you want to understand him.

yepps. really true.
so i gues we shouldn`t be so quick ta judge people.
we dunno what cicumstances they may be stuck in.
so in the same way,
i shouldn`t be mad at sarah fer what she said.

btw, lol. i love that 70`s show.
i quote:
"row row row your boat
gently down the stream
scrubbing scrubbing scrubbing scrubbing
fez is nice and clean"

haha..was looking through my photos.
and well..just reminiscing.

`03



miss dewi!!


nballers sending me off.. =]


himalayas.

`04

just before e-zone..i think. or maybe nationals.




no wrds can describe this pic. LOL.

tadaa! testingg..haha.
so proud of myself.
uploaded some bluetooth usb thingy all on my own.
fer someone whu`s practially computer illiterate.. =]
haha..yar. well anywayss.
dat`s the pic of the sky divers w/ smokey trails.
took it with my phone..wish it had zoom function.
the parachutes not very visible..right?

// thr *you are..

feeling..wierded today.
went ta sch, got forced ta tuck in my shirt aaalll the way.
thn training also same thing.
in sch uniform, must be able ta see the skirt band.
in training gear, must be able ta see the shorts elastic thingy.
bleaghs- dmn nball nerd squad. =P
but it ain`t so bad la.
until.dat.stewpid.coww.nvr.tuck.in.properly.!.
everybody must pay 5bucks. this is so sick.
extortion! but thn..the money "goes ta charity".

hmm..i think it`s such a waste dat li jiawei didn`t win anything.
looking at her. i think she deserved ta win lor.
aiz- but i guess. too much pressure.
can understand how she felt la.
but i guess she tried her best.
kudos ta li jiawei. and ronald susilo.
kinda hooked onto olympics.
looking at how strong a human body can be.
sth definately wrong with me.
suddenly feeling all..inspirational?
upset to retarded to inspirational.
been mood-swinging a lot lately.

yarr..thn now i sms-in ren.
we`re just like very damn diappointed.
SHE did`nt listen ta us.

// girl with the broken smile

just got home from the sky diving festival.
wow. wish i was one of the ppl jumping.
on the ground kinda boring la.
lotsa music. some games shit.
but nuthing cld beat jumping outta the helicopter.
as i was walking inta marinabay mrt, saw some skydivers jumping.
think they were the pro ones.
they had some coloured smoke thingy behind them.
thn last night aft my tuition headed dwn ta womad.
good crowd..lively.
twds the end, felt a bit retarded..haha.
cuz of all the tribal-like drummings.
but being retarded in the midst of a huge crowd?
not good. esp whn you`re alone. =P

anyways..shall save ta fork out that 200plus ta sky dive next yr. =]

feeling damn worried.
lately thr`s been newpaper reports.
abt how maoists have blocked access to ktm.
worried fer my family.
whut if they dun`t have enough food thr?
whut if things get violent?
whut if whut if..
doesn`t help that most of the men in my family are police/military.
heard a lot of police officers been killed by maoists.
aiz-
wish i cld save the world; like i was supergirl

// carry me away, away, away..

*yawns* just woke up..damn groggy now pls.
skipped school today cuz im sick.
the med is really damn strong.
took it once i got home and fell asleep immediately.
in fact, im still sleepy now.
girls are prolly preparing fer training. =P

got a tiring weekend ahead.
like i said, tmr`s lit,art,tuition.
thn sunday, ren jio me go see sky diving festival at marina south.
mann..if i knew abt it earlier, i`d have forked out that 200+bucks ta jump.
but it`s okayy.
shall just add it ta the "things i wanna do before im 25" list. o.O
thn dyn wanna go jamming. the last time i went wuz..dec.
aiz- dun`t feel like going la.
not as if im so pro can play whole songs or whtevr.

green day - panic song

ready for a cheap escape
on the brink of self destruction
widespread panic
broken glass inside my head
bleeding down these thoughts of
anguish.. mass confusion
the world is a sick machine
breeding a mass of shit
with such a desolate conclusion
fill the void with.. i don`t care
there`s a plague inside of me
eating at my disposition
nothing`s left
torn out of reality
into a state of no opinion
limp with hate

// i wld wish upon a star; but tht star, it doesn`t shine.

wheee~ passed chi! =]
and did well fer a maths too.
think im finally improving.
wahhahaa..or maybe its all in my mind.

anywayss.
watched a charlie chaplin movie in class today.
fer chi lesson.
but it was fun la..haha.
i think i prefer it ta modern movies.
haha..supposed ta fast with syid.
but i fergot..typical me. =P
aiz- i cant cope with lit..can i?
dunno la.
sat having lit meeting.
thn aftwards going fer mobius.
shell sponsering us i think.
thn got tuition at night.

hmm..past few weeks, i been watching ppl at skate parks.
just so happens my tution cher`s hse thr got one.
so yeah..just sit thr watch ppl lor.
some of them can do really cool tricks.
dun even know why i bother.
it`s not like im watching them ta learn. o.O
but it helps pass time.

argh- damn frustrated now.
but thr`s no way i can spill everything here.
it`s not nice ta expose skeletons in others` closets.
aiz-

feeling terrible lately.
but fer no particular reason.
changed template a bit.
pink is..too happy fer me.

finally graduated from active programme on sat. =]
got our certs and all.
finally saw coach too.
trained today. sucky la..
coach been in selection stages fer so long.
doubt she can make up her mind.
not cuz we`re all so good..
rather cuz we all suck. aiz-

okay..i think im finally sick of cheese fries.
bleaghss-

friends came ovr today.
ta study maths.
thank god we actually did so.
feel like swimming!!
haha..mann. can`t find my guns n roses cd. =/

aiz-uneventful dayys.
unless you count the reprimanding of all netballers.
feeling like such a lousy captain.
aft i took over thn all these complaints.
sadded. dunno whut ta do.
firstly, we all kenna fer attire.
now, we have ta tuck in all the way.
i dun`t really mind. nerds rule. o.O
haha..but whut bothered me was today.

early morning, mr.teo announced over pa.
asked netballers come down.
we got a dressing down.
netball area was unclean.
left behind stuff from yest training.
aiz- my fault. im supposed ta check everything.
plus all the stress of handling whole squad.
the task is pretty damn daunting.
feeling so helpless.

studies seem ta be going down the drain slowly.
can`t seem ta get info into my head.
bahhh. im a useless freakk.

// whr does love go aft it`s gone?

came across dat qtn in a book.
a damn weird book.
but whut the heck, weird books fer weird ppl. =P

went fer bbq last night.
kinda pathetic i guess.
was at louise`s house.
wow. her condo is so much nicer than mine. o.O
haha..anyways. we were all pushing each other into the pool.
until the guard reprimanded us.
thn all of us gathered ta watch sg idol.
lol. most of the contestants were big jokes la.
esp. the one who sang lemon tree.
haha..but least he had ta guts ta do it on national tv.
one thing i have ta mention.
syida`s turning girly. lol.
looked kinda minah actually. haha..but cute la. =]

aiz- am so dead.
havent done any of my work.

// you ain`t nuthing but a hounddawgg!

mann. billy bombers is..powerr.! =]
feeling very retro now..haha.
dragged parents down with me fer lunch.
till now, im damn stuffed.
unfortch, it`s not halal.

hmm..talked ta mrs ng on fri.
can`t decide if i like her or not.
can`t decide if she likes netballers or not.

anywayss. nuthing much happening.
went ta town on fri.
syid`s like the ultimate shopping partner.
haha..nvr realised it before cuz she rarely shops.
but she was damn enthu.
cow damn poor thing la.
think she felt kinda outta place.
cuz last min adora and jj say they going home.

wheee~ gonna buy elec. guitar from cousin!! =]

sickening sickening sickening.
i missed out a story in the previous post.
on tues ren, me and coww were shooting before school.
suddenly, mrs ng shouted at us ta go see v.principle.
so nonsense la the vp.
she dunno why mrs ng sent us ta her.
but she stared at us.
and scolded me and coww cuz we dun`t TIE our shoelaces.
wtf la. it`s not a crime ta not tie shoelaces lor.
no damn rule in the school says so.
thn told us meet her next day with tied shoelaces.

but on wed, vp didn`t come.
thn today..she was busy with some japanese ppl visiting school.
but just recieved an sms.
mrs ng wants ta see me and coww tmr.
got a feelings it`s sth ta do with the laces thingie.
such nonsense.

it could only happen in DUNMAN!

been so lazy ta update lately.
but since i got the time today..why not? =]
been busy with training..some sort.
coach still ain`t back yet.
she should be back by next wed.

hmm.went ta watch village just now.
the suspense was so nice.
but thr twist..horrible.
but we got a few screams in though..haha.
and watched i, robot last fri.
adora is like becoming new movie parter..haha.
aft coming outta the movie, we were staring at this new place at century.
billy bombers! it`s got the 50s/60s retro diner feel.
gonna open tmr.
so cool. got the jukebox thingies also.
thn some guy from thr was like damn nice.
explain ta us whut is whut.
hehe. we were saying we wouldn`t mind working thr.
i wanna try the place.
but adora was saying it`s very ex.

anywayss..can`t wait fer tmr.
national day celebration.
thn run 2.4, shoot.
gonna get our money..and thn shopping! =]